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I got the flue

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webmost

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Yesterday, very last thing from the office, I got on the horn with my favorite cigar geek at the headquarters of my local cigar store chain, looking for the Ave Maria Immaculata. Someone on another forum had suggested it, knowing I love the Ave Maria Reconquista. The Immaculata is the same blend wrapped in CT, so my hope was it might stink less when smoking indoors in this winter weather. Long story short, they don't carry it.

Then the geek starts waxing enthusiastic about this fabulous cigar he just tried for the first time made with Kentucky flue cured. I've never heard him like this. I mean he's off the table. You can hear him salivating. Loves this new flavor. Crazy about it. I tell him I have a batch of that aromatic KY smoky intoxication straight from the farmer, waiting for a chance to roll some up.

Then I put the phone in my pocket, pull on my leather jacket, ride home thinking about BigBonner, and check the mail. There's a box containing this:

goff.jpg

A hatful of premium cigars and a bag of flue cured shirazi that SMELLS LIKE HEAVEN by gawd. I'm telling you. I wish this was smell-o-vision. Knocks you right out with deliciousness.

The box says it came from Robert. This is the moment when I reveal that I am an idiot savant. That's right. Actually, I prefer savant idiot, because the other way round it sounds like the idiot prevails. The effect is similar, but the proportions are reversed..The idiot savant can't cope with much but there's one item he can handle where he concentrates all his brain power. I can cope with a variety of problems, from computer programming to motorcycle mechanics. I just have these four blind spots where complete and intransigent idiocy sets in: Tone deaf. Black thumb. Can't remember names. Excessively blunt. That's it, be yourself, and there is no cure. So here's a name sounds familiar but I have zero clue.

Robert? Who the hoff is Robert?

Might's well be Trebor spelt backwards.

Is it one of you?
 
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webmost

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How come all my got taken out? This post does not work without the .

My name is Michael Maus. People call me Mickey. Take out the Maus and whattaya got? Not much.
 

webmost

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Okay Deluxe. I got your address now brother. Incoming. You best make like Donald and (last name removed for delusional paranoia)
 

deluxestogie

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Webmost,
Forget the "savant" part. I had your address from the package you mailed to me about 2 months ago, filled with dark stogies.

Bob
 

webmost

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Webmost,
Forget the "savant" part. I had your address from the package you mailed to me about 2 months ago, filled with dark stogies.

Bob

I did?

sheesh.

Must be gettin Goofy (who, far as I know, does not have a last name)
 
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