You humans have never understood us plants. Each of us is a community of countless, anonymous organs directed at a single biologic purpose--to reproduce. You look at the root of one of my cousins, and say, "that's a fine carrot, if we can just prevent it from bolting." You covet the fruit of another cousin, and complain about having to spit out the seeds.Daniel said:THen the plant seems to get the ide of reproduction and begins to neglect it's finest work.
Now, I'm just a tropical weed. I hate the animal kingdom, and all you humans with it. All I want is to reproduce before I die. I even make up my own chemical weapons, in the hope of being left alone. Where does that get me? You guessed it. You humans love my chemical arsenal.
I've got this leaf thing pretty well figured out. I grow progressively more efficient photosynthesis factories, until my metabolic momentum is just right for making seed. Then I launch my bud head and blossom.
"Don't do that!" you shout, as you top me. But I've got a backup plan--sleeper cells that can be activated at the least provocation from uncomprehending humans. Ouch! One by one, you frustrate all my alternatives.
Okay, so life sometimes fails to meet my expectations. I can deal with that. But then you say that I've neglected my finest work, when all along, throughout the season of my life, you prevent me from performing my finest work.
A pox upon all your houses!
An anonymous tobacco plant