deluxestogie's Corn Stalk Sitter Pipe

[deluxestogie]

Cornstalk Pipe Bowl Prep

Yesterday, I made a trip to Michael's Arts & Crafts (less in-store hiking than Lowe's), and purchased a jar of fine sand and a tub of Plaster of Paris.

The plaster instructions recommend a ratio of plaster to water of 1:1. In my mixing, I ignore the presence of the added sand (which was added at a ratio of 1 part sand to 1 part plaster). This stuff becomes unworkable after about 6 to 8 minutes, so mixing tiny amounts is good.

My first step was to seal and smooth the interior bottom of the bowl. At the same time, I added a very thin coat of the sandy plaster to the walls, as a prep for a thicker coat. I allow this to dry.

The final coat will be allowed to dry thoroughly, and then I will smooth it a bit with either rough paper (like German toilet paper!), or some sandpaper.

The exterior bottom has not been as sturdy as I would like. To improve the "sit", I used Shoe Goo to attach an extra large craft stick, and adjust the vertical alignment of the bowl. Once this is dry, I will trim it all to match the bowl, using a razor, whittling blade.

I still have to decide if I want to apply any stain (golden or walnut) to the pipe. I have both in an alcohol base. I kind of like the stalk's current appearance.

Bob

 

[greenmonster714]

Nice job Bob. This should turn out well. I'd be on the fence too about the stain. Maybe try a little on some other corn stalks to see what ya get. The natural look is good too.

 

[davek14]

Let us know how it smokes!

 

[Levi Gross]

You seem to be a very industrious man Bob. Clever idea and unique...

 

[deluxestogie]

Thank you. This pipe (yes, globally unique) is an excellent example of how much work it can be when you begin with the wrong starting material for a pipe. A section of stalk does look promising, but it's nowhere near as handy as a corncob. Is it any wonder that it's unique?

Bob

 

[ChinaVoodoo]

This seems more like a cathartic exercise of both comedy and raw curiosity.

 

[davek14]

I've got a totally burnt out Missouri Meerschaum Ozark Hardwood I'll try this on once I feel like tinkering. I usually smoke cobs a lot and have some nicer briars certain things taste better in. Presently I'm playing with cheap estate pipe parts and have cobbled a couple briars for on the road use. Something to smoke out and about without the stereotype of a cob, but that I can smoke in the wind, etc. I might be able to make this thing look fairly presentable.

 

[deluxestogie]

Davek14,
An easy replacement for a MM burned out shank is a section from a bamboo tomato stake (untreated). You can match the circumference of the bowl side-bore, saw that end of the stake, then match up the bit end. If you have a better bit than the crummy plastic that MM likes, it will last longer. Shoe Goo will seal the bowl to shank junction, so long as you keep it from the interior of the bowl.

Bamboo does burn, but much more slowly that the standard MM shanks.

Bob

 

[ChinaVoodoo]

... If you have a better bit than the crummy plastic that MM likes, it will last longer.

Bob

I always detested their stems, but I recently bought a couple pipes from them, and they had really nice ones. I think they are black acrylic.

 

[deluxestogie]

Unfortunately, MM has multiple bit tenon diameters on their current pipes, and these differ from their earlier pipes. I have a 1970s MM cob pipe with its 4th crushed bit, but none of the bits in the bargain bag of (11) pipes would fit it. It's good that they are replacing their 2 cent plastic with 10 cent plastic.

Bob

 

[davek14]

The Ozark comes with the black acrylic stem. That's a retrofit. I use reed stems on cobs quite a lot. I like having a "churchwarden-ish" stem at home and kicked back and I also have to avoid clenching due to TMJ issues. The advantage is that I have an excess of stems. For on the go stuff carried on my person I've always preferred rough and ready. I've got an I-phone one I don't worry too much about dropping.

I love my cobs but they do have a stereotype. My ladyfriend is in the hospital for knee replacement and I've been exiled to a bus stop bench off campus to smoke. Just yesterday I was having a bowl and some kids walked by and stopped and marveled at me. "Hey look, is that an old corn cob pipe?" Hey mister, is that a corn cob pipe?"

 

[deluxestogie]

Yes, folks at medical facilities have a way of abusing their extravagantly over-paid positions to deride tobacco users. [I do recall staff-only smoking rooms behind every single nursing station at university medical centers. How soon we forget.] The kids marveling at your corncob made me smile. Thanks.

Bob

 

[ChinaVoodoo]

... a bus stop bench off campus to smoke.

Mind blown. I do believe that's a $250 fine, here.

 

[deluxestogie]

I Smoked the Pipe Today

I "smoothed" the plaster/sand bowl liner using a dry Popsicle stick, leaving the surface rough. This was mostly to remove easily dislodged sand from the surface. The thin, wood base plate was trimmed to match the shape and angle of the base of the pipe.

Using my Cyprus Knee recipe for an English pipe blend (essentially Towers of Antioch plus Perique--37.5% Latakia), I packed the virgin pipe from the bottom to the top. My (correct) assumption was that the plaster/sand liner would require no break-in.

It smoked beautifully, down to a clean, dry ash at the bottom. The only "pipe" flavor appeared when the burning reached the exposed edge of bamboo stem. The exterior of the bowl (stalk) became about as hot to touch as some thinner-wall briar pipes, but never hot enough to discolor the dried stalk.

CONCLUSIONS:

• A 50:50 mixture of plaster of Paris and fine sand is fireproof, does not crack from the heat of burning tobacco, and can be used to line any part of a bowl interior, such as the soft bottom of a corncob.
• A substantial cornstalk segment works as a pipe, but requires a liner (such as the 50:50 mixture of plaster:sand) to prevent it from burning through.

Bob

 

[Levi Gross]

I am glad that your pipe smoked well! May it be an inspiration for the rest of us pipe smokers to get a bit creative!!!

 

[deluxestogie]

I spent an hour or so trying to locate where I posted my 2014 WLT Perique Blending Matrix. It may be somewhere or other, but I couldn't find it. I'll post it here, since I mentioned one of the blends, and will also post it to the pipe blending thread.

Bob

 

[Levi Gross]

Is there any substitute for the virginia red? I have flue cured virgina thin leaf and virginia lemon, also virginia bright leaf.

 

[mwaller]

I would just substitute Virginia bright. They are essentially the same, but processed differently. I don't find them to be much different.

Is there any substitute for the virginia red? I have flue cured virgina thin leaf and virginia lemon, also virginia bright leaf.

 

[deluxestogie]

VA Red: https://wholeleaftobacco.com/Flue-Cured-Virginia-RED-TIPS-FCVRT.htm

Virginia Red is processed the same as all the other flue-cured (other than perhaps the yellowing phase, which may require more time for the batch of "red" to go from green to yellow). The difference is that Virginia Red leaf is primed from higher on the stalk than the brighter leaf. Certain varieties yield redder reds, while others produce brighter brights, but the red is upper leaf of whatever variety is flue-cured. There are two significant differences that you should consider in substituting brighter leaf for red.

1. Red has a fuller aroma, with higher nicotine.
2. Red is not as sweet as the brighter leaf, and so is less acidic. This may come into play when blending with Perique to neutralize the tongue bite.

Bob

 

[ChinaVoodoo]

CONCLUSIONS:

• A 50:50 mixture of plaster of Paris and fine sand is fireproof, does not crack from the heat of burning tobacco, and can be used to line any part of a bowl interior, such as the soft bottom of a corncob.
• A substantial cornstalk segment works as a pipe, but requires a liner (such as the 50:50 mixture of plaster:sand) to prevent it from burning through.

Bob

Good job, I'm now envisioning permanently installed pipes in random places like fence posts, gazebos, hot tubs, head rests, etc.